#tell us wtf happend the last time u guys met

[baezzz-mid]

Wukong to Macaque

something something wukong misses macaque and despite everything, he is happy to see him and he hates it because he just wants to move on with his life, he wants to focus on the future instead of drowning in the mistakes of the past like he always seems to do when he interacts with Macaque, but he genuinely can't leave Macaque behind, no matter how much he *wants* to

[deadass-pool]

january 8, 2023 - new year; new problems

soooooo,,,,, past blog entry did not AGE well... here’s the thing, i’m writing this as i am currently experiencing a pregnancy scare. NOW, now, NOWWW..... i get what you’re thinking, “yo, what the fuck?”, look i can explain. alot has happened the past 2 months that i was QUIET on here, and i did not tell my friends neither have i told YOU anything... so here’s what happend:

november: - i lost my idgaf war, i was hung up on the same guy that i was talking about from my past blog

- i was soooooo hung up and i wanted to move past this attachment that i reinstalled the same dating app where i met him. have i told yall that i’m still in contact with him the entire time? except he was so full of bullshit and i was tolerating that because,,, well... i’M DUMB!

- ENTER the guy who i knew from twitter. he is very funny and im a fan of him and we matched on the app, anyways it was a short encounter. i was intimidated by him because i felt like i didnt pass his vibe check. i wanted to be his friend because he is very funny and cool so like, i was very devastated when the last message in our conversation was me and he just liked my text. (mind you, we had a long conversation, i’m just anxious because hes very cool so i just straight up dipped out of slightly “out of vibes” reaction which is liking the message)

- friend saw me on the dating app and announced it while we were drinking, i was embarrassed so i deleted the app

- guy from twitter had a hit tweet, i replied as a joke, i thought he wouldnt recognize me anyways he dmed me and asked me why i left the app SO I WAS SURPRISED BECAUSE HE NOTICED !!! my ego skyrocketed like crazy. i forgot to let you know guy on twitter is well known, basically a micro internet niche celebrity idk

- i am now talking to 2 men at once: guy from my elementary school & guy from twitter. anyways, fast forward to whatever the fuck was going on, guy from elementary was slowly losing interest or whatever, we were still sexual but our conversation started limiting to just sex and it was starting to get tiring but im still hooked up for his attention and everything and im so so so stupid compared to guy from twitter whos very decent to talk to 

- i ended up planning to see guy from twitter AND guy from elementary. except the latter never went with his words and boy oh boy the former did

SOOOOOO...............

december:

- im still HUNG UP ON HIM HE ENDED THINGS ON MY BIRTHDAY I WAS SO FUCKING BGSHHGBSHDGBSHFBSHDF SO SO SO 1!!!!! upset and sad and yea wtf was that he never let me speak about it he just apologized and said happy birthday and IM SO FUCKING SAD AND BROKENHEAWRTED I WAS DRUNK ON MY BDAY 

- anyways still hung up on him i lost my virginity to guy from twitter and that was the biggest plot twist because out of everyone i didnt think i would be hooking up with him especially when i used to just see him have hit posts all the time on the tl (if u want tmi he is very good in bed i orgasmed lots)

- still in contact with guy from twitter hes ok we r friends hes cool hes nice i do not feel any attachment towards him idk where that attached virgin stereotype came from 

- found out guy from elementary went back to his ex before december ended and i was so annoyed and pissed because he couldve just told me instead of leaving me hanging and not letting me speak jfc 

anyways i think i left a few details here and there and now, i am typing this, days before my supposed period, it’s the 21st day of my cycle and i am INCREDIBLY ANXIOUS because i just realized i had sex BEFORE MY OVULATION and now i could not stop hitting myself with my pillow and praying to the lord BECAUSE I HAVE SO SO SO MANY PLANS AND SO MUCH DREAMS THAT I NEED TO REACH!!!!!! like it’s so embarrassing already to just lose your virginity at 23 WHAT’S MORE EMBARRASSING IS GETTING PREGNANT AT THE FIRST TIME!!!! i do not want that neither do i want to mother a child that’s goinna turn out of a mess just like i am!!! on god please for the love oF GOD GIVE ME MY PERIOD I AM SO STRESSED I CANT HANDLE THIS ANYMORE I HAVE A CAREER THAT I’VE BEEN FOCUSING ON LATELY 

ok that’s it

sincerely,

me

[roseycutie93-blog]

dear dad.. thanks for nothing.. & i hope you die in a most painful ways.. yours truly.. your lovely daughter who dissed the shit outta you

it’s been a while since i shared my personal life on tumblr.. but i’ll tell u mine that happened 2 weeks ago..

my relationship with my dad wasn’t as good as you can guys imagine.. he WAS nice to me & all.. but to my brother.. he wasn’t THAT nice to him at all even when he was an innocent child

my parents were divorced when i was only 3 & a half.. & i lived with grandma & uncle till we settled up in a place near to them before i started college 5 years ago

my dad is the type of a mad man.. he was raised terribly by grandpa until he became a copy of his own father.. same goes to his siblings, except one, his younger brother... my uncle, who was the nicest of them all.. unfortunately he died 7 months ago & i couldn’t get the chance to see him often.. 

as soon as dad got married.. he thought.. having a son should be treated in another way.. like yelling, beating him up, blaming him for any fights he gets or even raising him by showing off in front of people & making my dad look like the victim.. & finally forcing him to study something he doesn’t like such as changing from french to deutsch (& he fucking lied that he used to take french & deutsch in his days because fuck that didn’t happen) like he yelled at his son in public for the silliest thing & made strangers confronting my brother for that.. WTF?!!

thanks to him, my brother would start get into a fight with not just me, but mum, uncle & grandma even his classmate until he became the most hated student in his school, not to mention that he would be jealous because i have friends & people to like me even my dad himself.. i got hurt by his jealousy & cursed that father for turning my brother into a person full of hate, jealousy & despise!!

years afterwards before i graduated from high school, my brother went to a therapist & he takes medicines for the rest of his life.. what could be more worse than that??!

i’ve always hated my dad’s way of raising my brother ever since i was a child because all i know is parents should be equal to their kids no matter what.. but dad was the type of also NOT CHANGING HIS FUCKING PERSONALITY & that’s what he got..

2 weeks ago, we met dad in front of grandma’s house, at the street, like we used to every week, at first he was ok & started to fix himself, but eventually he got into a fight with brother for a fucking interface... imagine that

all my brother did (& he was half awake) that we shouldn’t talk about it because what happend happened (he was trying to NOT get into a fight)

but soon he started to yell in front of the gatekeeper & his son getting insulted by our lovely dad.. i tried my best to stop the fight like i used to & become a peace pigeon but his voice started to getting raised more & more people started to get attention towards us

i told him “dad, stop it, people are looking”

“& what’s the matter with people looking at us? why do you even care? i’m raising my son over there“

even when we head to the car to get things chill he didn’t stop

i couldn’t take it anymore & i had three choices

-either i should let him yell & do whatever the shit he wants to us

-leave the place quietly

-or just burst my feelings out because fuck i’ve had enough of my 24 years of my life & my brother’s getting insulted weekly for NOTHING!!

& this is what i did... i chose the third choice without even thinking

when i tried to protest & told him that we should not get yelled at no matter what.. he didn’t respect that..

so this is what he got.. an insult from his lovely daughter that held enough of her father’s shitty attitude for looooooooooooong that you can people imagine..

“I’VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU & YOUR DAMN ATTITUDE FOR YEARS THAT MY BROTHER & I HAVE & I CAN’T TAKE IT ANY LONGER.. IF YOU’RE GOING TO KEEP UP WITH THAT ATTITUDE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE & TREAT US LIKE KIDS.. THEN NEVER CONSIDER YOURSELF HAVING KIDS NOR HAVING A FATHER FROM THE FIRST PLACE.. I DON’T NEED YOUR DAMN MONEY.. I’M THROUGH!!“

my dad’s face was speechless.. he never expected his cute lil princess to burst out on her father like that.. as i myself didn’t believe that i finally FINALLY did the right thing to cut ties with the most irritating & annoying thing in my life.. my father (or so called father)

i left the scene without looking back as my brother followed me (he was under the medics so he didn’t react as much as he hated father’s attitude) i regret nothing.. & still.. even tho i wished if i flipped him out before shouting to come over for the last time (call me an disrespectful, ungrateful brat.. but this is what he gets for crossing the line)

my mum was shocked & tried to comfort me, so was my uncle & grandma.. & they told me that they never thought i would say such cruel words to him.. i can’t even call him dad anymore

i was patient enough to listen to them & treat him as just a sick man who needs treatment.. or even my boss from my work

seriously.. i don’t mind handling my teachers, my professors & my boss at work as long as it’s not personal.. it’s just business nothing more

but i’m here talking about my dad.. a mere stranger with a shitty attitude.. you can’t deal with people with shitty attitude & become just like them in anything

my family’s mum, in particular, always gave me excuses that god should give chances to the likes of my father because no matter what he’s my father & that we should respect him & never EVER insult him EVEN if he did bad things (& they’re too nice to understand me & my brother’s pain)

me & my brother have had enough of the weekly dose of depression whenever wherever we see our father during weekends.. & we get upset for the rest of the week BECAUSE OF HIM!! even his lies.. he never stop lying in my face!! & worse.. he once jokingly harassed a woman when we told him he can get married.. & he never admitted his wrong for doing that.. like “so what?!”.. how low & disgusting it is!!

what father would treat his kids that kind of way?? what kind of raising is that?? it’s fucking barbaric & ignorant & it makes me sick to my stomach!!

parents should raise their kids about morality, scolding when their kids do wrong, teaching them the right & the wrong, give them the amount of happiness even if things went wrong.. THIS. IS WHAT I CALLED.. RAISING!!

i asked myself why?? why am i blessed with a fucked up father?? why can’t i have a father like my uncle who treated his late wife, kids & grand-kids kindly?? i went to a whole new level of depression because of that (even tho i had a lovely mother)

i never cared much about my parents getting divorced nor even cared that i never had the best father because i only have one mother who raised me with love & respect.. until social media & real life fucked me up in my feelings of how most of people loved their father.. i was jealous & hurt, & i cried for a week for missing that kind of feeling.. because i wanted to feel that caring father like anyone would have.. but it was destiny

i even suspected that this so called father was keeping us away from his brother because he knows we’ll love him more than our real father (there was also a situation that a mother kept her children away from seeing their grandmother “her mother in law” for years because of the same fucking reason)

but now i’m moving on.. i don’t need any sympathy or pity

for those who are facing with a situation with a parent (whether a father, mother, or both).. my advice for you.. run.. run as soon as u can & never look back.. bash this person off & tell him how u feel before things get worse.. if he kept up with that attitude over & over & cost you not just your dignity.. but your mentally as well.. run & disappear from that person.. it’s the best punishment for being a bad parent (as much as it hurts but u must be to save your mentality).. & don’t you ever listen to those so-called religious people because most of them honestly never been in YOUR shoes!!

dear newly-wedded-mother... if your dear loyal husband lay a hand on you or your children.. take them & disappear.. even if you gave him one more chance after divorce to be a parent for once of his life & suddenly started to tease you by using your kids as a pawn (even if it gets to kidnap your kids)... go away & never return.. your kids deserves much better peaceful life.. (a story i’ve heard from a friend of mine, that her friend's married & had a daughter.. the father wanted to kill the mother to keep the daughter) so better prepare yourself..

but of course most importantly & be fair for god’s sake.. IF he actually changed himself for the sake of the kids (although i’d rather for you to stay separated from your husband for necessary).. DO NOT bash on your kids of how bad their father was... your kids must know their father & they’re the one to judge.. NOT YOU!! (a guy who went to search for his father who disappeared at the age of 2, & the reason was because they got into a silly fight.. silly fight wouldn’t let a mother to keep her son/daughter away from the father which is unfair)

however.. IF your kids complained that their father/mother started to NOT be himself & begged you to let them cut ties with him/her.. DO NOT force your kids to handle their crazy mentally abuse father just because god told us to HANDLE THEM NO MATTER WHAT... god would never be fair with the likes of those so called fathers/mothers.. your kids’ mentality is much important than letting them seeing their father/mother during weekends & getting dose of depression & hatred that would change their mentality for worse for the rest of their lives

sorry for the long story but had to get it out of my chest

thank you for reading